On my long slog back to fitness, there is one thing that I have been avoiding.
I always had a love hate relationship with running. It’s something that many runners know well. I liked it and I didn’t, often at the same time. There are good bits and not so good bits of it.
When I first started out running, I used to run to my local supermarket and back. It was less than a mile in total, and my goal was to be able to run all the way there and all the way back without stopping. It took me a while but I got there. A couple of years later I ran for two and a half hours without stopping in my first half marathon, a feat I would never have believed I could achieve that first, sweaty, difficult time.
The thing about running, is that to get any better you just have to keep going. Yes, other stuff matters. Having a decent pair of trainers, fuelling your body appropriately, learning a little about form…. But mostly it is about just running and then running some more. There are no shortcuts to become a good runner.
I have this tension going on. I am glad I am out there, putting one foot in front of the other. But I am also constantly reminded that I am not as good at this as I used to be. I am all too consciously incompetent. I don’t like the way my body moves right now, or the ragged feel of the breath that I just can’t regulate properly. Yet.
I know that my only choice is to keep going. To keep putting on my running shoes and just simply go.
It will take time but I will get better.
If I just keep running.